books

Enhance Your Downtime: Try Effortful Fun

Bardees, , , Leave a comment

I read Tranquility by Tuesday last year, and this idea stuck with me: “Effortful Fun Before Effortless Fun.”

The most straightforward kind of leisure time is, of course, scrolling on our phones or watching something, so Laura Venderkam argues that we can add a little bit of effortful fun when we feel too exhausted to do anything productive before using our screens every evening. For example, why not read a book for a few minutes, work on a puzzle, or get some crochet stitches done before? It’s like a small pre-requisite; you can’t check social media until you read a little. After your effortful fun activity, you will feel good, and those minutes will add up with time. 

One effortful fun activity that I do is tracking some metrics on an app called Exist that provides nice analytics for me. I track my waking up time, for instance, and my writing and publishing habits, and most importantly, I set a rating for the day with some notes about it, just like a mini digital journal. Mood tracking has been my favorite part of this simple app since I started using it years ago. So, after I do all this tracking at night, I open social media or watch my favorite series.

Another effortful fun activity that I do is checking my book highlights on the Readwise app, which reminds me of favorite passages I highlighted on Kindle books I read, which Readwise directly imports from my Kindle, or famous quotes from audiobooks or paper books I read, which Readwise offers the option to manually add to my library. I feel inspired whenever I read these quotes and often share them with friends and family on WhatsApp or save them for my Sunday Spark readers.

I genuinely love these apps, and recommend trying them for some effortful fun or finding activities you would like to do more and placing them before these effortless scrolling/watching sessions.

Please note that the links provided in this post are affiliate links, which means I may earn a commission if you make a purchase through them.

Enhance Your Downtime: Try Effortful Fun

A letter of gratitude to Seth Godin

Bardees, , Leave a comment

When I was playing the conversation cards game with a group of friends, The question I got was: Who has had the most significant influence on your life?

My answer was: Seth Godin.

Have I talked about Seth Godin here before? Oh yes, I have!

I started reading his daily blog in 2009, a few years late to his daily blogging practice. A year later, I ordered his currently widely-acclaimed, newly-released-at-the-time book, Linchpin. That was the first book I read by Seth. He has published 21 books.

In 2016, I ordered the Titan book by Seth Godin, a mammoth of a book that was a collectible and included his best-of blog post writings of 2010-2016. This book is still the heaviest thing I ever ordered online. 

One of the coolest stories I have about Seth is that my photo/name is on the inside cover of his book The Marketing Seminar, which was launched in 2018. Seth wrote the book based on his workshop with the same title (TMS for short) that I took part in as soon as he announced it a year before. After he wrote the book, the graduates of the first four cohorts, like me, were offered early-bird copies and were encouraged to post book reviews (which I did but no longer can find). We were included in the book cover as a thank-you for participating in TMS. A marketing genius, isn’t he?

After that, I took many workshops by Seth; The Podcasting Fellowship stands out. I took it twice, once in the summer of 2018 and then in the fall of 2019 because I did not do the work the first time. 

A few weeks later, I took the altMBA workshop with Seth Godin, the best immersive learning experience with Seth and his team of coaches. I graduated from the 35th cohort, the last cohort before COVID-19. 

In February 2020, I was about to meet him. I booked a ticket to Europe to attend his keynote speech, but when COVID hit, the conference got canceled, and I was refunded. 

His book, Your Turn, was one of the most motivational books I have ever read; I gifted a copy to a friend.

I gifted his book The Practice to my creative mastermind group in 2021. 

I loved his gift to the world, Stop Stealing Dreams that I paid someone to translate into Arabic so I would share it with my community. I then had to review the translation to make sure the translator captured what Seth meant, but I didn’t finish that because I found out that it was already translated to Arabic by someone else, so I did not publish it.

I have yet to read Seth’s latest book, The Song of Significance, but I’m sure that based on what I heard in this interview with him by fellow altMBA and podcasting course graduates, I will love it. 

What did Seth teach me?

• He convinced me I have a voice I need to use to express my opinion or make assertions as he says. He told me that our online world means we all have microphones.

• He encouraged me to create my podcast before podcasting became cool here in the Arab world. I launched it in 2020.

• He redefined creativity for me and made me believe I was creative even though I did not paint.

• He redefined what art means. It’s work, done with care, that changes people.

• He defined discipline and generosity for me by writing a daily blog post for nearly 20 years, publishing 21 books, and shipping tens of meaningful projects.

• He made me fall in love with the word Ship; “If it doesn’t ship, it doesn’t count”. Because of you, I am writing. 

Seth, thank you for everything, 

Thank you for the light bulbs, discomfort, and lessons of integrity, respect, and empathy. You taught me how to care about my work and legacy and be an indispensable professional and freelancer.  

I am forever grateful for you and hope to tell you that in person one day.  

A letter of gratitude to Seth Godin

Notice the Mosquitoes

Bardees, , Leave a comment

I’m currently reading a book called How to Begin: Start Doing Something That Matters by Michael Bungay Stanier. It’s an excellent book/workbook about goal-setting for what he calls Worthy Goals.

I want to share a brilliant exercise in this book called Listing Mosquitoes.

“Your Worthy Goal comes with a cloud of its own Mosquitoes. These Mosquitoes are all the things you’re currently doing and not doing—secular sins of commission and of omission—that are contrary to this Worthy Goal you’ve set for yourself. You’ll find they’re numerous. Some are tiny, others more significant. No single Mosquito is fatal in and of itself, but together they irritate you, weaken you, slow you down, and distract you from your Worthy Goal.”

“Notice Your Mosquitoes: Write down the things you’re currently doing and not doing that are not leading towards your Worthy Goal. Actions and non-actions, big and small. Make them tangible and real.”

“This is you confessing, owning up to the ways you’re actively undermining your Worthy Goal, colluding against your own ambitions, scuttling your dreams.”

It especially resonated when he gave the example of his goal to “Launch a new podcast that is in the top 3 percent of all podcasts within 12 months”.

Michael shares what he is currently doing that is hindering his goal:

“Things I’m doing that are contrary to this goal include: investing in a consultant then ignoring her recommendations; setting a standard then immediately downgrading the ambition of the podcast to make it smaller; starting another, unrelated podcast that I can do in my usual small-scale way; being timid about the guests I’m inviting to the unrelated podcast; buying expensive podcast equipment then not learning how to set it up properly. Refusing to figure out the marketing.”

What he should be doing but is not:

“Things I’m not doing are even more numerous. They include: not creating a vision for the podcast; not setting a budget (time or money); not listening to other “role model” podcasts; not hiring a professional podcasting agency; not attending a podcasting conference; not learning about podcast marketing; not calling myself a podcast host; not exploring distribution partnerships.”

It made me think of my podcast as I approach its 2nd anniversary with host-on-mic only episodes. Do I want to maintain it or take it to the next level? What is this next level?

Thank you, Michael, for this rich book and enlightening concept. I am working my way through it.

Notice the Mosquitoes

Starting a New Job? Here is Some Advice.

Bardees, , , , Leave a comment

My friend is starting a new job soon, so I sent her this list of helpful reminders; maybe they will help you too:

  1. Starting a new job is uncomfortable; you are used to being the expert in your previous job, but now you will be the newbie. Not knowing all the answers is uncomfortable.
  2. Sit with the discomfort and accept it, realizing it is a temporary phase.
  3. Those first weeks are your golden opportunity to ask questions. You are expected to. Your new team will not look to you for answers for a while. Don’t act as if you have them; you don’t.
  4. It’s time to practice listening and hold off jumping to conclusions. Just listen.
  5. Set clear boundaries about what’s OK and what’s not OK, especially jokes and personal questions.
  6. Some employees will try to win you from day one. It’s nice to feel welcomed, but they are not your friends yet, let time show you who they are.
  7. Some employees will try to plant seeds about other employees. Please don’t take their word for it. Even if they trust or like another employee, that does not mean you should too. Let your own experience determine your relationships.
  8. Some employees would be so insecure that they will see you as a threat and try to sabotage you, keep your eyes open, and listen more than you talk.
  9. You have always said you want to leave work at work, so it’s time to walk the talk. Changing your job is a chance to change your work style. You may be used to taking work home and getting work done after your kids sleep, but people at your new job do not know that. The first step is to leave at 5 pm on day one, right when the official working hours end. You don’t stay late to prove anything to anyone. Instead, you become so efficient during working hours to shut down work entirely until the next day. If you stay late, on the other hand, you will set that as their normal expectations from you, while leaving at 5 pm would be abnormal.
  10. Changing your environment is a great way to start new habits and get rid of negative ones. Try taking your lunch box instead of ordering takeout, bringing your coffee with you instead of buying it, taking walks during lunch breaks instead of staying glued to your screen, listening to a new podcast in your new route, or changing your attire or hairstyle.
  11. Read the book The First 90 Days.

Happy probation!

Starting a New Job? Here is Some Advice.

A Self-Compassion Example

Bardees, , Leave a comment

It was a Saturday, I woke up feeling already overwhelmed by the back to back errands that all needed to get done that day. I felt I did not want to wake up. I felt that I wanted to hide under the bedsheets. I felt resistance, and even regret, due to committing to all this in one day because of a deadline the next day.

Then, I started to talk to myself gently. I put my hand on my heart and patted softly saying “It’s alright sweetheart, you can do this, it’s okay.” It really felt good. Just like we calm our children when they are having a hard time coping, we still have this inner child that stomps her feet whenever she feels too tired or not in the mood to go on. I observed my resistance and nurtured myself back to adulthood that morning.

I did not realize I even practiced self-compassion just like I learned in the book Radical Compassion until later in the day, this book got to me and I put it into action when the need arose. It is such a good book, and self-compassion never felt more clear to me than when I read this book. Give it a try.

A Self-Compassion Example

We are getting better

Bardees, , , Leave a comment

My bedtime reading is usually spiritual. I’m loving my recent selection so much, it’s a book called “Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers” by Anne Lamott.

I’m sharing with you a quote I read last night that perfectly aligns with the blog post I wrote in the morning.

“I pray not to be such a whiny, self-obsessed baby, and give thanks that I am not quite as bad as I used to be (talk about miracles). Then something comes up, and I overreact and blame and sulk, and it feels like I haven’t made any progress at all. But it turns out I’m less of a brat than before, and I hit the reset button much sooner, shake it off and get my sense of humor back. That we and those we love have lightened up over the years is one of the most astonishing sights we will ever witness.“

I feel the same. We are becoming more resilient, we are bouncing back faster after failure. This makes me hopeful and more committed to all my good daily habits.

Let’s keep waking up early, meditating, journaling and reading. Let’s keep praying and moving our bodies. Let’s keep reading our affirmations and visualizing our success.

We are getting better.

We are getting better

Rereading

Bardees, Leave a comment

I hardly re-read any paperback books. The only books I usually re-read are audiobooks because I miss a lot of the content first time round. However, this is my 4th year reading The Daily Stoic. This is such a good annual read that I highly recommend.

Whenever I see something underlined or highlighted by my past self I get mixed feelings. Sometimes I feel “I hardly changed, this part still amazes me“. Other times I feel “That does not resonate with me anymore“. Many times I wonder what I was thinking when I circled a passage many times. I always highlight new parts that stand out to me but did not before.

Rereading a book is a lot like rereading old journal entries where you meet a younger version of you. You feel you changed a lot and not that much simultaneously. It is a beautiful feeling. That’s why I’m more convinced I need to take book notes because they are also a documentation of who we are when we read those books.

Rereading

How to Take Book Notes

Bardees, 1 Comment

“When reading a paper book, I just underline or circle the bits I find surprising or useful. Then when I’m done reading the book, I type those bits into a text file.“
-Derek Sivers

“The Blank Sheet Method:
–Before you start reading a new book, take out a blank sheet of paper.Write down what you know about the book / subject you’re about to read — a mind map if you will.
–After you finish a reading session, spend a few minutes adding to the map with a different color.
–Before you start your next reading session, review the page.
–When you’re done reading, put these ‘blank sheets’ into a binder that you periodically review.“
-Shane Parrish

These days I’m thinking about a question I receive a lot which is how to retain information we read. I don’t retain information enough, yet, especially that 80% of books I consume are in audio format. I don’t take notes about audiobooks or paper books I finish, I just highlight a lot in paper books. When I read on kindle I highlight what I like and thanks to the magical Readwise app, which imports my highlights and shares a few of them with me every day, I am remembering more of what I read recently.

I have also been using Blinkist app (this link gives you a one-month free trial) to review summaries of books I already read or new books to see if they are worth buying. I use Blinkist every single day. It’ brilliant and I love that I have the option to read or listen to very well executed summaries.

To better be able to retain and use what I learn from books I started reading How To Take Smart Notes. When I write here I want to start from somewhere and not stare at a blank page and this book will teach me how. I am learning a lot and will share with you as I go. I definitely need to start taking notes of books I read and tag them properly so I find them when I need them, that’s a confirmed piece of information you can use right away.

I have always known how Ryan Holiday and Gretchen Rubin take notes, I just need to start a sustainable way that works for me.

Another sources that would help you take book notes are these posts by Derek Sivers about his process for taking book notes and how to read a book.  

How to Take Book Notes

Book Interviews Playlists

Bardees, , Leave a comment

I recently started a habit of collecting podcast interviews for books I love in Spotify playlists. It’s so amazing to listen to a favorite author talk about the book after or even while you are reading it.

I will keep updating this list and pin it soon to the website.

Book 1: Seth Godin- The Practice:

Book 2: James Clear-Atomic Habits: and in Arabic

Book 3: Cal Newport-Digital Minimalism

Book 4: Greg McKeown-Effortless (brand new)

Book Interviews Playlists

Delightful Encounters

Bardees, , , Leave a comment

It feels like stumbling on a treasure to me whenever I find interviews where my most favorite authors talk to each other, it’s like: “I knew it! They DO know and like each other and life makes sense and my interests are so cohesive”. I actually squealed with excitement when I first saw the recording of the LIVE interview of Seth Godin with Martha Beck for her new book (The Way of Integrity). I always wondered if Seth and Martha knew each other and they did (imagine my excitement if I watched it in real time).

Another collaboration I enjoyed listening to and learning from last week, although done in 2019, is between my heroes Cal Newport and James Clear who continue to inspire me every single day including my latest podcast content.

One more brand new collaboration I highly recommend you go check out is the virtual book launch with the fantastic authors Jon Acuff and Greg McKeown about their just released books (Soundtracks and Effortless). As I mentioned in previous posts, I am reading them both and finding them beautifully complementing each other. Yesterday’s post was actually how they started this conversation and I had no idea they did until I listened to it this morning.

I also smiled when Greg said that going past episode 20 in your podcast is a huge success that only about 10% of podcasts achieve, others quit before.

I am about to launch my 25th episode.

So cool.

Delightful Encounters