burnout

The Subtle Signals: How to Know When You’re Off Track

Bardees, Leave a comment

How do you know you are off track? 

What are the signs that you are not at your best, out of shape, or not doing well?

This is a list of what my goals group shared when I asked this question, and I added some of my own: 

  • Clutter at home or office.
  • Food rotting in the fridge.
  • Ordering Junk Food/Takeout.
  • Laundry accumulates and, if done, remains on the couch for days.
  • Skipping positive practices like gratitude journaling.
  • Forgetfulness.
  • Pains in your body.
  • Getting sick again.
  • Not going out in the sun.
  • Not walking or moving body.
  • Feeling sleepy most of the time and dragging oneself to places.
  • Skipping skin routines.
  • Skipping showers.
  • Oversleeping more than usual.
  • Not answering other people’s messages for days.
  • Not initiating contact with other people.
  • Forgetting what it means to feel inspired by an idea.
  • No curiosity or excitement.
  • No music in your life.
  • Easily irritable.
  • Snapping at others.
  • Road rage.

What are your signs that you are off track? 

Define your list, and when you notice one of the signs, let it trigger you to ask yourself, “What do you need?” over and over, and then wait for the answer.

After that, take action.

I love to ask myself this question on paper and write whatever comes to mind.

Sometimes, the answer is to ask for help. 

The Subtle Signals: How to Know When You’re Off Track

What Resentment Is Saying

Bardees, , Leave a comment

If a phone ring makes your spine crawl, something has to change. 

Are you worried you will receive another request from a client, manager, colleague, or partner? 

This visceral reaction could be one of the following:

  • You are on the verge of burnout. Exhausted from doing too much for too long.
  • You have feelings of resentment. 

The underlying feeling of resentment is surprise, surprise, envy, not anger, as Brene Brown revealed in her book Atlas of the Heart. You feel resentful because you want to experience what others are experiencing. 

For example, if you resent someone for resting, it’s not about being angry they are not doing their share of the workload; it’s because you want to rest.

If you resent someone for dressing nicely, it’s because you want to dress nicely too, not because you are angry they are wasting their money.

David Allen said he felt the phone call spine crawl at some point, which means his business burdened him because he felt the transaction with the calling client was unfair; his company was doing more than they were getting paid for. So, how did they solve it? They raised their prices, and the phone call dread went away. 

Where do you feel resentment in your life? 

What do you feel is missing?

What do you want more of? And less of? 

Sitting for a few minutes and writing answers will help you define where you need to ask for help.

Is it the kids’ homework, the house chores, or the monthly report? 

Do you feel resentful because other people are having alone time, seeing their friends, or traveling?

These feelings can turn into goals with action plans. They could be conversation starters with significant people about support and what it looks like for you. These feelings could be your signal to learn to say no and to ask for more.

How can you make an easy wish happen soon? 

Do you need connection time? Plan that coffee date with your friend.

Is your body aching and needs movement? Look at the week ahead week and allocate time for walking, or better yet, with a friend; health and relationship goals in one.

Resentment is a masked wish for change. Listen to it with curiosity; it is here for guidance.

Subscribe to receive my future blog posts:

What Resentment Is Saying

Magic and Energy

Bardees, , Leave a comment

A good night sleep, a rested body, a healthy gut and an alert mind, are some of the natural things that most of us enjoy every day but take for granted. When they go missing, however, we lose our magic.

We don’t have enough energy to process data or people. We find it hard to avoid road rage caused by a reckless driver who cut in front of us. We get edgy with our boss for making a very reasonable request. We feel needy when a loved one does not answer right away. We more than dislike online schooling and any newly assigned homework like the plague. We seek food for comfort that can’t be grasped. Our attempt to save our energy turn us into whiny selfish human beings. We feel like we lost the capacity for kindness or understanding. We take things personally.

This happens when you miss a good night sleep or two.

Imagine this state expanding over days and weeks. This turns into burnout. No time for self-care turns us into exhausted cynics. We feel we can’t make a difference and the light of hope dims in our eyes.

If you feel that what I described is how you feel most days, I am here to tell you 2 things. First, you are not alone and second, given your circumstances, it is still not natural to feel this way, no matter what others tell you.

You are meant to thrive. You are meant to feel hopeful. You are meant to feel your goodness and extend it to others.

Name it to tame it. This is burnout, and it happens when you put aside your needs and take care of the needs and demands of others for too long. It is not sustainable. You need to take care of you first before taking care of others.

Start your healing by asking yourself what are you depriving yourself of? And whose opinion are you depriving yourself for?

You need a break to just be, to give your soul some space to breathe unrushed, so that your body could restore the energy it lost.

Your magic will return when your energy returns. You and your world deserve you at your best.

We need your magic. Take care of you.

———————————–

Blog Post title inspired by this.

Magic and Energy