inspiration

You Will Find Your Way Back

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I am posting this right after I finished teaching a 2.5-hour workshop on journaling, my favorite part of my morning routine.

At the end of the workshop, a bride-to-be participant shared with me that she’s afraid to lose herself when she starts a new life with more responsibilities and commitments. She asked me: how would she keep her good habits, like journaling, then?

My answer to her was this: Yes, you will change as you enter a new life, and yes, you will have less time for yourself than you do now. However, I’m here to remind you that you have a head start. You are already on the path of self-awareness; taking this workshop is one example, and this means you will notice when you wander away from your best self as you adjust to your new life. It will take time to figure out the person you would like to be in the relationship, to define your boundaries and your non-negotiables, but nothing works if you abandon yourself. The relationship thrives when you are happy as an individual. Journaling is one way of taking care of yourself among many. If/when you stop it as life gets busy, I promise you this; you will find your way back.

You are not the same person you were years ago. You are aware enough, you worked so hard on yourself, and you grew so much that no matter what changes disrupt your life, you will endure and find your way back. That even if you fall, you will not stay down for long nor dwell on your failures; instead, you will rise up, way faster than the past you.

  • What if we get quarantined again for some reason? We will find our way back.
  • What if we grow our family and life gets too hectic? We will find our way back.
  • What if we travel and stop some habits we worked hard for? We will find our way back.
  • What if someone needs us to step up and constantly be there for them? We will find our way back.

Isn’t that the definition of resilience?

Give yourself this reassurance as fear creeps in when you embark upon the unknown: If you start and stop or if you get lost, you now know your way back. Trust that you have created an anchor you’ll return to again and again. You can restart as many times as you want.

Liberating.

You Will Find Your Way Back

By Now

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By now I should be able to be calm and patient with my kids.
By now I should have my home decor and design taste all figured out.
By now I should have a proper dining table for guests.
By now I should be driving that fancy car I always eye in the street.
By now I should be making that amount of money.
By now I should have my emergency fund up and running.
By now I should be able to cook extravagant meals.
By now I should have upgraded my beauty routines.
By now I should have the body of my dreams.
By now I should have started my own business.
By now I should have a much higher number of followers.
By now I should have traveled the world.
By now I should have had a third kid.
By now I should have had kids.
By now I should have registered my kids in extracurricular classes.

How did you feel reading the above?

Have you noticed that dreadful word; should?

Should is such a heavy word that we need to question constantly; coupling it with an arbitrary deadline, such as “this many years into adulthood”, makes us feel much worse.

We feel less than, not enough and late to the party. Who decides who is invited and when the party starts, no one knows. We are just late. That’s what society taught us. So, we set too many goals but achieve none, and knock too many doors but don’t stick enough to see if one opens. We are too late to wait and find out.

I am here to tell you that yes, time is finite, but that makes it all the more worthy to spend doing what matters most to you, not what others say you should do.

Yes, you can’t do it all and have it all. Once you stop fighting that and accept it, you will see that the gift of time is to sharpen your big-picture most important goals, so you would seek only them and forsake the shoulds that are hunting you.

Your big picture goals are probably very different than mine, but the question is, why are you checking mine?

Reflect on where you want to be at the end of your life to uncover your most important goals and work backward from there to now, to your very next step right here.

Your timing is perfect.

By Now

Spiritual Excel Sheet

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When I get stuck on a task I don’t enjoy or did not do before or that has a lot of ambiguity, I feel I need to muster my strength and power through it using the practices I learned and proved to work before; like research, analysis, using timers for deep work sessions. I think to myself get focused and get it done. I noticed I never pray for guidance and feeling ease because my work task is so earthly and Divine guidance is not part of the equation for me. Not only that, but I had a limiting belief that this is not where we use spiritual practices, and that we should only use them in relationships and managing emotions.

But why not for work?

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Spiritual Excel Sheet

What Fires You up?

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I am so impressed by the stories of Todd Parr that I got for my kids recently. They are so funny, meaningful, colorful. I even felt like hugging those brightly colored pages that my kids laughed with me/at me in amusement.  

The latest book we read was called The Feel Good Book. We loved it so much that we kept naming things and moments that make us feel good long after finishing reading it.

This reminded me to share my feel-good list I made recently using my PowerSheets, appropriately called: “What Fires Me Up”.

Here it goes in no particular order:

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What Fires You up?