By now I should be able to be calm and patient with my kids.
By now I should have my home decor and design taste all figured out.
By now I should have a proper dining table for guests.
By now I should be driving that fancy car I always eye in the street.
By now I should be making that amount of money.
By now I should have my emergency fund up and running.
By now I should be able to cook extravagant meals.
By now I should have upgraded my beauty routines.
By now I should have the body of my dreams.
By now I should have started my own business.
By now I should have a much higher number of followers.
By now I should have traveled the world.
By now I should have had a third kid.
By now I should have had kids.
By now I should have registered my kids in extracurricular classes.

How did you feel reading the above?

Have you noticed that dreadful word; should?

Should is such a heavy word that we need to question constantly; coupling it with an arbitrary deadline, such as “this many years into adulthood”, makes us feel much worse.

We feel less than, not enough and late to the party. Who decides who is invited and when the party starts, no one knows. We are just late. That’s what society taught us. So, we set too many goals but achieve none, and knock too many doors but don’t stick enough to see if one opens. We are too late to wait and find out.

I am here to tell you that yes, time is finite, but that makes it all the more worthy to spend doing what matters most to you, not what others say you should do.

Yes, you can’t do it all and have it all. Once you stop fighting that and accept it, you will see that the gift of time is to sharpen your big-picture most important goals, so you would seek only them and forsake the shoulds that are hunting you.

Your big picture goals are probably very different than mine, but the question is, why are you checking mine?

Reflect on where you want to be at the end of your life to uncover your most important goals and work backward from there to now, to your very next step right here.

Your timing is perfect.