Month: February 2021

A Snowy Day

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Those have become so rare in Jordan where I live that we got so crazy looking at the snowfall yesterday. My kids and I literally jumped up and down of joy while running from one window to another in the house to see the snowy view each one displayed.

This 24-hour storm gave me the chance to experience playing in snow with my kids aged 7 and 5 for the first time because it was their first! The energy they had was astonishing and adorable, especially my youngest. When we came back in the house, I realized he was all wet but never complained once because he was playing so hard.

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A Snowy Day

Anticipate

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Anticipate is one of my favorite words. If we think about it in terms of work and projects, it is really helpful.

Anticipation helps us plan better if we:

  • Anticipate changes.
  • Anticipate obstacles.
  • Anticipate questions.
  • Anticipate expenses.

Anticipate is another term for risk management in projects or how we might do a SWOT analysis. It is, in this case, a guiding direction.

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Anticipate

Keep Your Goals Visible

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Today I wrote my work goals for the year on a white cardboard paper to keep them on my desk visible to me all the time like |I did last year.

I spent the first 6 weeks of the year analyzing and reporting last year’s performance and preparing for a kick off meeting presenting all my findings. Now that this task is done I’m back to working on my objectives for the year. Seeing them written in front of me reminds me of my priorities and keeps me focused.

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Keep Your Goals Visible

Radio Crush

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A little thing that few people in my life know I like to do every now and then is sending voice notes to my favorite local Arabic radio station Watar FM. It’s my favorite because their Arabic choice of music is so good and especially because I respect their strict policy of not speaking over music. So when a song is playing we get to hear it from start to end. No ads. No interruptions. On the other hand, there are certain radio shows elsewhere where we are put through the agony of presenters singing along with songs not just cutting them. Does it annoy you too?

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Radio Crush

Productivity Technique: Time Blocking

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Time blocking at work has been an indispensable productivity and focus technique for me in the past months. I learned it from Cal Newport and Charlie Gilkey.

At the start of each workday I write what I plan to do on a time schedule. I use my weekly passion planner to do that and I use erasable pens as I edit it when needed.

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Productivity Technique: Time Blocking

What Fires You up?

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I am so impressed by the stories of Todd Parr that I got for my kids recently. They are so funny, meaningful, colorful. I even felt like hugging those brightly colored pages that my kids laughed with me/at me in amusement.  

The latest book we read was called The Feel Good Book. We loved it so much that we kept naming things and moments that make us feel good long after finishing reading it.

This reminded me to share my feel-good list I made recently using my PowerSheets, appropriately called: “What Fires Me Up”.

Here it goes in no particular order:

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What Fires You up?

Evening Reflection Questions

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I mentioned in my evening ritual post that I like to end the day with reflecting on the day using the five-minute gratitude journal which has an evening section consisting of 2 prompts:

  1. 3 Amazing things that happened today…
  2. How could I have made today even better?

I am happy I built my gratitude habit so well that I find it so easy to answer question one. I still get stuck sometimes answering question 2 because sometimes I really feel I gave it all I got that day. That’s why I try to ask myself this question in a different way, making it more specific, like:

  1. How might I have been harsh, uncaring, unfriendly, or unkind today?

Below are some other good reflecting questions shared by Ryan Holiday to give yourself a pat on the back on the progress you are making.

  1. What bad habit did I curb today?
  2. How did I improve today?

More reflections questions I loved (and shared here before) from the author Tasha Eurich

  1. What went well?
  2. What didn’t work?
  3. What did I learn from this?
  4. How will I be smarter tomorrow or next time I face this?

The internet is full of good questions to use for reflection, do not overwhelm yourself. What is important is you start this end-of-day reflection habit. Choose one to three questions only to answer every night to make the habit as small as possible so you would stick to it. Keep your reflection journal on your pillow so you will see it when you go to bed and remember to do it.

Happy reflection!

Evening Reflection Questions

My First Brush With Positivity

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Do you remember the first self-help book you ever read? I do. It was the classic Norman Vincent Peale’s book The Power of Positive Thinking, translated to Arabic. I read it one summer when I perhaps was 14-15 years old at my grandmother’s house where I used to spend summers with my sisters. My aunt Stella bought it or borrowed it from someone. I remember being mesmerized by the idea that we need to pay attention to the quality of our thoughts. I remember my excitement reading it and enjoying this shiny new type of non-fiction books I got my hands on.

I usually give credit to reading the more recent controversial book The Secret for turning on the lights for me how my thoughts were powerful and that I needed to watch them. This classic book I read as a young teenager, however, was actually the first to tell me there were two kinds of life outlooks. The positive and the negative.

I now wonder why I had to stumble into a book to learn this key life lesson. How can I teach this skill to my kids? I believe the way I behave and talk to them and to myself infront of them is crucial in teaching them this view. But is it enough?

Thinking about this book today I realize I need to be more vocal about how to view our life’s ups and downs and let my kids find out the good news from their mummy first.       

My First Brush With Positivity

Skin Care & Self-Awareness

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Yesterday I went to work with leftover makeup from the day before that I tried to update in the morning with some compact powder and fresh lipstick. The reason is I went out that night and was too tired to take off my makeup when I got back, and also didn’t manage my time in my morning enough with driving to school back on. Any skin care specialist would be horrified to read what I did since that is a big no no in the skin world.

Reflecting later in the evening I realized that all day I did not feel good because my face did not look fresh and I remembered I was even avoiding people because I didn’t feel confident enough of my tired caked skin. This is how important self-awareness is. It is important to notice your feelings during the day and to ask what is going on and what could be the reason. My self-inquiry reminded me I slept well that night, I ate well, I worked so productively and did not waste time. Then I remembered I did not like my reflection in the mirror that day or being around people due to my choice the night before to skip makeup removal.

Self-awareness leads you to taking action to improve your results, so, before I slept yesterday I made it up to myself with extensive skin cleaning and moisturizing steps. This morning I took my time to apply fresh makeup on a clean face too. This all felt so good! I felt I was practicing an act of self-love doing all those steps. It’s self-care at its simplest. My rituals are in place to help me be at best. I just need to keep practicing them.

When I dress up, I do it for me, when I apply makeup -even though a mask is covering my face most of the time- I do it for me. I feel pretty and confident and ready to positively communicate with the outside world which will benefit from my high energy. There you go, a win-win situation.  

Skin Care & Self-Awareness

The Four Personality Tendencies

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A productivity hack I always use is booking a meeting with my manager a week in advance to share with him a presentation he requested from me. What’s the hack you ask? It is the fact that I most probably have not started working on the presentation yet. This meeting is how I make my commitment to finish the presentation in one week abiding. It keeps me accountable. If I wait to book the meeting until I finish the presentation, doing the presentation will simply drag and the task will take longer as I personally experienced in the task and according to Parkinson’s Law which states: “work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion”.

Accountability is such a powerful tool towards achieving our goals, we all need it in some areas of our lives more than others.  I usually need accountability in doing tasks requested by others while I need less accountability in tasks I initiate. This all made so much sense when I discovered I have the Questioner tendency according to Gretchen Rubin’s Four Tendencies Quiz.

On the other hand, I noticed that many of my friends simply deliver any work or family task on time just because they were asked and people depend on them. Those same people find it hard to commit to going to the gym 3 times a week because no one is counting on them to do it. According to Gretchen’s quiz those friends are Obligers. Obligers need to create accountability systems for their personal goals or else they will keep feeling bad why they are not making any progress. Accountability could come in many forms such as a personal coach or a trainer, a work-out buddy to go with to the gym or whatever activity they want to commit to.

I believe this quiz is really helpful. Please note the word tendencies in the quiz title. Nothing is set in stone, knowing what you tend to do will help you make better choices and install the proper systems to support you. I enjoyed reading The Four Tendencies book. Fairly simple and packed with examples.

Do the quiz and share with me your tendency in the comments or by email bardees @ bardeessmairat.com.

The Four Personality Tendencies