I’ve always been the kind of person who monitors one’s self. I’ve always paid attention to my habits and tracked some of them; especially social media consumption. I’ve had rules when and what to check and for how long per day.
Lately, however, I’ve started to realize that being able to check social media is a kind of true luxury. It’ a sign that I did indeed have moments to catch my breath between various tasks.
Not anymore. I hardly check my favorite social channels and I’m always feeling late to the party. This is not so bad. But again, it’s one of many signs that things have changed.
Getting back to work after my maternity leave this time was a routine shock that I’m still recovering from.
I’m still navigating the waters of being a full time working mum with 2 kids now-one of which is a very strong-willed toddler who’s still potty training-and a home to look after that should feel like a sanctuary but far from it in the messy reality.
This post is not to complain. I fully realize how blessed I am. I’m especially grateful to the support we’re getting from both our families. It’s beyond generous. I honestly can’t imagine what we would have done without them.
I admit I’m also human, having all these mixed feelings is very normal and common. This is a new territory that needs time to settle in. If settling ever happens.
This post is in fact one way to accept and embrace the life I’ve already chosen for myself.
This rings true to what a wise person told me: “You need to let go of the old Bardees and find a way to love and make peace with the new one”.
And to all who share my experience in their own lives I say: Less reminiscence. More acceptance. This is how it is. So how will you handle it? It’s up to you.
Me? I’ll find the best version of myself and remind myself that things change fast, and in the bigger picture, this is just a very temporary phase that I will for sure miss.